Break Me
by catsmeow79
Summary: Dark-ish Delena fic, takes place after Damon turns Abby. How can they move past this? Smut in later chapters.
1. Chapter 1

_Author's Note__: Okay, so this is my first shot at Vampire Diaries fanfiction. This takes places after S3E15. I'm not sure where it's going yet, but I think it will likely be dark, also rated M for language and sex. I mean, what's the point of writing Delena if Damon doesn't take his clothes off, right? Reviews appreciated_.

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><p>"<em>You know, you're not fooling anyone either. You still love her Damon<em>." Stefan observed, not the slightest hint accusation in his voice, maybe for the first time ever.

"_I do, and I thought I could win her from you fair and square_." Damon admitted out-loud, stung by his own foolishness for a minute, "_She didn't want me." _he whispered, not quite succeeding at the tone of indifference he was going for as he remembered how it had cut him to realize that his undying love was a "problem" for her "_It's for the best" _he concluded _"I'm better at being the bad guy anyway_" he finished, tipping his glass in his brother's direction before heading across the hall to his bedroom.

Damon entered the darkened room, not bothering with lights as he lay down on his bed, letting the sadness and the liquor wash over him in waves. Nobility had never been his strong-suit, he'd done what needed to be done in order to save Elena and he refused to feel guilty about it. Taking another sip of his bourbon and then another, he remembered her words the night of the decade dance when he'd let her think that Bonnie was dead "_Let's get one thing straight Damon, Bonnie will not die for me, I will __**not**__ let that happen_".

He remembered the determination in her eyes, the fire with which she'd held his gaze as he'd told her that he would always choose her. That wasn't what Elena had wanted to hear, it still wasn't, at least not from him, but it was the truth none the less. No matter how much of his long-forgotten humanity she may have brought back, Damon would always kill whomever he needed to in order to protect her, let Elena hate him for it if that's what it took, at least she still drew breath.

Damon took another swig from his tumbler, barely feeling the burn as it cascaded down his throat, the pain dull compared to the searing pain in his heart. Let Stefan be her hero, feeding off small woodland creatures and talking about her "feelings" with her, Damon would be the one who kept her alive, her anger was a small price to pay for that prize.

Hours passed and bottles emptied, it seemed that nothing would soothe his savage soul tonight, so Damon left the boarding house and jumped into his car. A hundred miles an hour down the winding country roads, the stars like a blur above him as he navigated with vampire precision. He didn't know where he was going, only that in this moment, he needed to be as far away from Elena Gilbert as he could get.

Driving on auto-pilot his mind was surprised where his body had led him, realizing where he was only a moment before Wickery Bridge came into sight. Damon stopped the car suddenly as his headlights illuminated a figure sitting alone on the side of the bridge, legs dangling over the water far below.

"_Jesus Christ, Elena_" he snapped, leaping from the car and walking toward her "_It's three o-clock in the morning, what are you doing out here by yourself_?" he demanded angrily, it seemed he could never escape her even if he wanted to. He may have talked a good game about letting her hate him, but he hadn't planned on facing her expected wrath tonight.

Elena rose to her feet as he approached, turning away from the water slightly to face him. Damon could see the tears that streaked her face glistening in the moonlight as she looked toward him with her doe eyes, imploring him/accusing him? She was uncharacteristically quiet, saying nothing as her gaze pierced through him to his very core.

"_How much did you really think I could take_?" she whispered, so quietly a human could never have heard her, but Damon heard her, recognized the despair in her voice.

Before he knew what was happening, time seemed to freeze as she took a purposeful step backward, her eyes never leaving his as they burned her last moments into his mind forever, her hand letting go of the support beams as she slipped from the side of the bridge, plummeting down toward the icy depths of the water below.

Damon's legs moved as if they were trapped in quick-sand, his vampire speed failing him as he struggled to run toward Elena, to catch her before she fell. He reached the edge of the bridge in time to see the splash as she landed in the water hundreds of feet beneath. Searing pain burned through his body, hot and sharp as if someone had driven a stake directly into his soul.

"_NOOOOOOO_!" he screamed, jolting awake as he tumbled from his bed, his alcohol-induce slumber ending abruptly as he crashed to the floor with a loud thump.

"_Damon_?" Stefan's voice questioned from the threshold a few seconds later, his eyebrows arching in concern.

"_It's nothing_" Damon replied quickly as he stay where he'd landed momentarily dazed, more from the memory of the look in Elena's eyes than from the fall out of his bed. He hadn't dreamed like that in, well . . . ever. The closest he'd ever come were his wolf-bite fueled hallucinations, and those had mostly been actual memories - regrets, deathbed realizations of the mistakes he'd made along the way and so forth.

Damon shook his head vigorously, trying to knock the last vestiges of the liquor from his foggy brain, he felt physically ill. After many minutes, he rose slowly, and when he looked up Stefan had vanished from his doorway. He walked into the bathroom, splashing cold water on his face, still unable to erase the image of Elena's hopeless face from his mind. Damon stared at himself in the mirror for a long time, his jaw tightening at the accusatory reflection that now stared back at him. If this was what having a conscience felt like, it was no wonder he had done without for so long.

"_Dammit_!" He cursed silently, stalking over to his wardrobe angrily and grabbing a shirt and jacket, putting them on in a hurry as he descended the staircase and headed toward his car.

Damn Elena Gilbert for making him feel all of this again. Damn her for sending him out into the middle of the night to make sure that she was okay (again). And damn her most of all for making him realize that if she _wasn't_ okay, it might actually be his fault. Damon pushed down on the accelerator as he suddenly realized that Elena could do far worse things than hate him . . . . she could choose to leave him forever.


	2. Chapter 2

A short while later, Damon was pulling his car up to the Wickery bridge, an unsettling feeling of deja vu descending upon him as he saw Elena's outline illuminated by the moon at the far end of the concrete expanse.

Damon knew that she must have seen his headlights in the darkness as he approached, she was aware he was there, but unlike his dream she did not turn around to face him as he walked toward her. Damon paused when he was only a few steps behind her "_What are you doing here in the middle of the night all alone_?" he asked, his voice purposely gentle as he tried not to startle her, the ghastly images from his nightmare still fresh in his mind.

It took a few minutes for her to respond to him, his voice eventually finding it's way to her ears through the fog of grief that surrounded her "_Contemplating the fragility of life_" she answered, her eyes fixed on the horizon, lost in thought. So many people she loved had died in the past few years, how much loss was one person supposed to endure?

Damon took several steps forward, coming to stand beside her. He could see her face now as he gazed down upon her pensive form. She wasn't crying, at least not anymore, but he could see the evidence in her swollen eyes that she had been previously. He allowed himself an uncharacteristic moment of self-hatred for causing her pain one more time. He imagined the look in Elena's eyes when she'd found out what he had done, the contempt in Bonnie's voice as she'd told her that Damon had turned her mother into a vampire. He felt a brief twinge of regret as he envisioned the hurt Elena would have felt at the tale. Still, it was nothing compared to the pain everyone who loved her would have felt if Elena had been the one to die tonight.

"_You_?" She asked finally, breaking from her reverie.

"_I wanted to make sure that you were okay_" he said simply, not really knowing the answer himself unless "I had a nightmare that I drove you to suicide" was an acceptable response to her question?

Damon steeled himself inwardly, awaiting her angry response, bracing for her wrath. Elena would call him a monster, accuse him of being heartless. She would compare him to Stefan where he always came up short, even after this latest ripper binge.

"_I'm** not** okay Damon_" she answered, shaking her head as she looked up at him for the first time tonight.

Damon swallowed hard against the lump that formed in his throat, there was something now that he'd never seen in her face before. It wasn't anger or sadness, grief or accusation, it was resignation and that, he didn't know how to handle.

"_I can't go on like this_" she whispered, lacking the energy to speak louder after the exhausting events of the day and knowing full-well he could hear her just fine at this volume "_Other people's lives matter too, Damon_"

"_Not to me, they don't_." he confessed, matching her hushed tone as he moved to sit beside her on the railing of the bridge. It wasn't an argument, he wasn't trying to hurt her, it was a statement of fact as simple and as true as "I will always choose you" had been and still was. He needed her to understand that he would never make any other choice, he **couldn't** make any other choice.

"_They matter to __**me**_" Elena insisted, her eyes pooling with unshed tears as she looked deep into his eyes. "_Ester could have ended it all tonight; Klaus, the Originals, all of them. We could have stopped them for good and saved hundreds of lives in the process_."

Damon blinked, averting his eyes from her penetrating gaze as he looked out across the water. She couldn't possibly be serious right now, was she actually saying that he should have gambled on Ester's spell working before Elijah's deadline ran out, taken the chance that Rebekah would kill her?

He turned to face her again and he found Elena's unwavering gaze waiting for him - - that's _exactly_ what she was saying. How could she treat her own life so casually? How could she expect _him_ to? A century and a half on this planet and Damon had never loved anyone the way that he loved her; not Katherine, not anyone, she was asking the impossible of him.

The thought of a world without her passed through his mind and suddenly, he was angry with her. How dare she trivialize his love for her? How dare she imagine that he could gamble with her life that way? Elena had made it abundantly clear that she didn't return his feelings, but she owed him at least the courtesy of respecting his. Suddenly, Damon was struck with an overwhelming urge to throw her over his shoulder and lock her in one of the many crypts around town where she would be safe until she came to her senses again. Without warning, he grabbed her arm firmly, pulling her to her feet and dragging her forcibly from the edge of the bridge and back in the direction of his car.

"_Damon, let go!_" she demanded, scratching at his fingers, trying to dislodge them from where they encircled her upper arm.

Damon held her tightly. He would have been amused at her attempt to break free if he hadn't been so furious with her ridiculous insistence on constantly endangering her own life. Actually, in point of fact, "amused" may have been the wrong word. He would be lying if he pretended that teaching Elena self-defense for the past few months had been about anything besides having an excuse to touch her, at least for him.

"_This conversation is over_" he fumed, slapped in the face by his own uncontrollable emotions "_I am taking you home right now_" he insisted, dragging her along beside him "_it is reckless and stupid for you to be out here alone mere hours after Rebekah nearly killed you_"

Elena tried to put on the brakes, digging her heels into the ground, but Damon out-muscled her without even trying, his momentum carrying them across the bridge swiftly. She was so tired of this caveman routine, tired of the Salvatore brothers acting as though she didn't deserve a say in her own life, like they could make life and death decisions about _her_ life without her consent and leave then her to suffer with the consequences afterward.

As they reached the beginning of the pavement, Elena's foot caught on the tiny gap between the road and the bridge, getting stuck for a moment and causing her to hiss loudly in pain as Damon drug her along. Hearing her wince, Damon stopped walking immediately, looking down to see what had happened, he wasn't trying to harm her after all. Elena took the opportunity his hesitation had allowed to twist her arm from his grasp, kicking the back of his knee out from under him with her good foot and using her weight to send him tumbling to the ground.

Damon laid there in the dirt for a moment, a look of complete and utter shock on his handsome face. "_I guess this is what I get for teaching you to take care of yourself_" he quipped, the absurdity of the fact that this hundred pound girl had just dropped him like a bad habit interrupting his righteous anger for a minute as a feeling akin to pride washed over him. Elena had always been tougher than she gave herself credit for.

Under any other circumstance, Elena would have taken a second to enjoy her victory, maybe even laughed at Damon's uncharacteristically rumpled appearance. Instead, she dropped to her knees on the ground beside him, all of the fighting spirit gone out of her as the tears that had been threatening now fell freely down her cheeks again.

Damon was at war with himself - torn between pulling her close, comforting her as she grieved and staying at a safe distance, where the sting of her ultimate rejection would hurt less. Elena's tears always cut him to the quick. She didn't cry very frequently considering her often-tragic life, and when she did, Damon wanted nothing more than to make her stop.

"_I'm sorry, I shouldn't have grabbed you like that_" he apologized. Knowing full-well that wasn't why she cried, he remained motionless where he had landed a moment beforehand, deciding that touching her again would be a mistake right now.

Elena would have thought she was all out of tears after the past few hours, but now fresh tracks streamed down her face rapidly as quiet sobs racked her body. She found that she barely had the strength to hold herself upright, so she leaned backwards against one of the bridge's support beams, preventing herself from crumpling into a ball on the ground.

When her tears had slowed, she lifted her eyes and found Damon watching her "_You promised you wouldn't let anyone hurt me" _she reminded him, wiping her cheeks with the back of her hand so she could meet his gaze with clear eyes before she continued_. "Why can't you see that YOU are the one who's hurting me every time you make me live with someone else's blood on my hands?_"

It was the quiet tone of her condemnation that did him in. Elena hadn't raised her voice, she wasn't even crying anymore, she simply looked at him, through him and into his soul. Damon felt like she'd punched him in the gut, if he'd needed air to breathe he was sure he wouldn't have had any at this moment. Right now, leaning against the bridge, moonlight streaming down on her fragile form, she had that same look in her eyes - - the one from his nightmare. She was done fighting . . . with him, for him . . . she was finished.

"_That blood is on __**my**__ hands, not yours_" he insisted, finding it hard to continue looking her in the eye even with his practiced air of indifference as he could see all the pain he'd caused her reflected there.

Damon stood up then, backing away from her, his eyes leaving Elena's to scan the darkness of the night surrounding them. He had been prepared to handle her hurt and her hate, but he wasn't prepared to handle _this_, this was something different.

"_I'm only human, Damon_" she continued, her voice forcing his eyes back to hers, holding them steady even as he wanted to hide from her "_I can't turn it off, not even for one night. I feel everything, __**all**__ the time._"

Damon wanted to turn away from her, break the connection between them but he found that he couldn't, her gaze froze him in place.

"_We can't go on like this_" she repeated, echoing her earlier sentiments "_I need for you to stop, Damon_"

Damon found that he couldn't move, he couldn't speak. Elena's words sliced into him like a dagger: ice cold steel and red hot pain, both searing through him at the same time. Was she telling him goodbye? Did she want him to stop loving her?

Elena pushed herself slowly to her feet, using the cement as leverage to support her weight, she was so tired, so beaten down, but her eyes had never been more clear or more certain than they were when she looked at him.

"_Damon, if you don't stop, you will break me_" she whispered, her eyes never wavering as she spoke "_You will break me, and there will be nothing left for either of you_"

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><p><em><span>Author's Note<span>: I hope this wasn't too wordy or angsty, but I just think there's a lot of issues that the show glosses over between Damon and Elena. I know it's a little dark right now, but I believe in happy endings, so never fear_ :-)


	3. Chapter 3

**Part 3**

_Author's Note_: _My apologies for making you guys wait so long for such a short chapter, it was a busy week in my real life. I thought it was about time we got a little Elena perspective in, so here goes nothing. Please let me know what you think, I'm a sucker for reviews_.

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><p>"<em>You will break me, and there will be nothing left for either of you<em>"

It had taken Elena a long time to figure Damon Salvatore out, but now she could read him almost effortlessly. She could see past the defenses that he had built around himself over the decades, see what he was thinking and feeling even when he tried so hard to hide it behind a show of bravado or false cruelty, tried to pretend that he didn't feel anything at all. Ironically, it had been her own feelings that had remained a mystery to her for far too long.

Elena had always known that she cared for Damon, felt the connection between them, the electricity that pulled her toward him, but she hadn't realized how strong it had gotten until the werewolf bite had nearly claimed his life. It wasn't even his impending death that had caused her epiphany, it was the moment _after_ - - when Katherine said she'd brought the cure, that something had changed inside of Elena forever.

Later that very night, as Damon healed from his injuries back at the boarding house, Elena lay curled up on the floor of her shower at home, warm water beating down on her as she cried her heart out. She cried for Stefan, alone somewhere with Klaus being forced to do God knows what, she cried for Jenna who's only crime had been loving her and Jeremy, and also she cried for herself, as she realized in that moment that she would have been absolutely destroyed if Damon had perished too that night.

As he had lay dying, Elena had told Damon what he needed to hear to be at peace - - that she forgave him for feeding her his blood, that she liked him just the way he was. It was only after he'd lived that Elena realized she truly _meant_ it - - she had already forgiven him and the implications of what that meant had terrified her more than anything ever had. _Damon had killed Jeremy, he would have sacrificed Bonnie at any time, what did it say about her that she could forgive him such atrocities_?

They had spent the next few months searching for Stefan, with varying degrees of cooperation on Damon's part, but it was always under the surface now, struggling to break free - - in her heart she knew she loved him, even if her mind had yet to catch-on to that fact. Elena was scared to admit it, even to herself, and with good reason - - she was scared of the _way_ he loved her and what it would mean if she gave in to her feelings and admitted that she loved him back. Damon's love was reckless and all-encompassing, it would completely consume her if she let it, so she had unconsciously tried her best to fight it, to remain friends as they had been before.

In the past, Elena had often wondered how Damon could swear that he loved her and yet cause her so much pain at the same time. _How could he keep hurting her the way he had_? It had taken Elena many sleepless nights to understand that this was the difference between the Salvatore brothers and the _way_ they loved - - Stefan had always been careful with his love, he wanted Elena to be happy, he wanted her to feel cherished. Stefan would never take her choice away from her because he couldn't bare to lose her respect.

Damon loved her beyond caution _or_ reason, he wanted only for her to be safe and damn the consequences. It was the same reason his love for Katherine had nearly destroyed him, he had loved _her_ that completely as well. Damon loved Elena enough to let her hate him if that's what it took to keep her safe.

Tonight, after Rebekah had released her from the tomb, after she'd found out about Abby, after Bonnie had rejected her, Elena had come to the bridge to think. Staring out across the water, Elena had allowed all of the fear and pain of the past year to wash over her, she'd stopped trying to keep it together for a minute and just let herself fall apart.

And that was when she knew - - all these months, she hadn't been lying to Damon, she had been lying to herself. As it turned out, Elena had _needed_ Stefan to come back. She needed Stefan to be okay so that she could admit to herself that she'd fallen in love with his brother. It was all so clear to her now looking back, how could she not have seen what was happening at the time?

"_You will break me, and there will be nothing left for either of you_"

Elena watched the play of emotions across Damon's usually stoic face as she spoke, seeing uncertainty and doubt mixed in with the pain for the first time in a long while. Her words had affected him, he was finally **hearing** her and she found that she couldn't stop now, no matter how painful this would be for both of them.

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><p><em><span>Author's Note<span>_: _I know this is still a little dark (and talk-y), but I really think Damon and Elena have a lot to work through before they could ever legitimately be together. Never fear, the rainbows and puppies (and shirtless Damon) are coming soon_.


	4. Chapter 4

"_You will break me, and there will be nothing left for either of you_"

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><p>Elena's words hung in the air between them for long minutes, the certainty of her assertion as clear as glass to Damon in this moment. This was what the nightmare had meant, what his subconscious had been trying to tell him tonight - - the Elena he loved was disappearing. She was losing herself and it was his fault.<p>

"_This whole collateral-damage-be-damned approach_, _it __hurts__ me._" Elena continued, taking a step toward him as she spoke, her eyes imploring him to **listen** to her "_It breaks me down a piece at a time_. _One day you will go too far and I won't be able to bounce back from it. You will kill the person that I am now and all that will be left is an empty shell_"

Neither of them spoke for several moments as her implication settled uncomfortably around them both. Damon wanted to argue with her, to tell her that saving her life mattered above all else, but suddenly he wasn't certain anymore. He found himself forced to admit that he'd never given much thought to the fact that Elena might hate anyone besides _him_ for his numerous crimes against humanity. He'd certainly never considered the possibility that she would hate _herself_ for his actions, it was such a foolishly human thing to do.

Elena felt better as she continued to speak, stronger suddenly than she had in months as she laid it all on the line "_You are being SO selfish right now_" she accused "_You aren't thinking of me at all, of what __**I**__ need, you're only thinking of yourself and the pain that you would feel if something happened to me." _

Damon swallowed hard at her words, the truth behind them stinging just a little as he realized just how well she had come to know him. Elena was right, he _couldn't_ bare the thought of losing her, even if she had never been his at all. Long ago Katherine had damaged something inside of him with her brand of "love". Katherine had made him scared to feel at all, and when he'd finally decided to risk that emotion again after so many years, he'd discovered that his fear of losing that love again was now his deepest abiding terror.

Elena could see by his reaction that she was finally getting through to him, she could see the realization dawning in Damon's eyes - - they were like a storming sea right now, dangerous and beautiful at the same time as a thousand thoughts swirled within their clear blue depths like a tempest. Taking a deep breath to steady herself, Elena continued.

"_What if you're __my__ Katherine_?" she asked, careful to keep her voice soft as she spoke, her eyes tearing involuntarily again, even as she tried to remain strong and see this through to the bitter end _"Damon, what if __**you**__ were the one who changes everything, the one who destroys me in the end_?"

Pain flashed behind his ice blue eyes, bubbling to the surface so deep and so powerful that his usual defenses couldn't hide it from her. Damon knew that Elena could see every emotion as their sudden rush to the surface of his usually controlled demeanor threatened to overwhelm him, the agony her words had caused, the agony **those** words had caused him. But she didn't look away, she didn't try to explain or soften the blow this time like she had at the Original's ball - - she had done it on purpose.

Elena had hurt him a hundred times since he'd met her, but this was different, it was the first time she had _intended_ to. She meant it this time, she _meant_ to cut him, nothing could be worse than comparing him to Katherine, the selfish witch who had condemned him to an eternity of misery simply for her own amusement. Damon took a step backwards, needing the physical distance between them right now, trying to shield himself from the pain of her emotional onslaught.

"_Would you be able to live with that_?" Elena continued, taking a step forward as he retreated, she wouldn't let him run away - he needed to feel everything that he'd been making her feel, all of the pain and the helplessness, he needed to understand what he was doing to her _"Because if not, you will destroy us __**both**_."

Damon flinched visibly as she approached, the urge to defend himself, to make her stop, overwhelming him temporarily. With lightening-fast speed, he grabbed Elena by the shoulders, swinging them around and pinning her bodily to the nearest tree. She didn't struggle or fight to get away, she didn't even look scared as he leaned into her, pressing her into the rough bark with his body, anger and pain flashing in his eyes, darkening them to pitch-black now.

Damon's anger was a terrifying thing and Elena had seen it very infrequently if at all in the past, but she had known it was coming now, known her words would hurt him and she wasn't scared of him in this moment, in her heart she knew that he would never raise a hand against her.

"_You should know better than to wound me by now_" he warned, his voice dangerously low "_I do not react well to pain_"

"_I remember_" she promised, her voice taking on a newly cold edge as she turned the knife, deliberately pushing him farther "_Jeremy remembers too_"

Damon stilled for a moment, remembering the sound of terror and heartache in Elena's voice as he'd snapped Jeremy's neck in her bedroom that night when Katherine rejected him, remembering the way she'd looked at him as he'd left. For a second he couldn't breathe at the memory. He had gotten so lucky that Jeremy had been wearing the ring. For someone who believed that regrets were a waste of time, Damon regretted that night above all the other crimes he'd committed in his lifetime. His love for Katherine had taken him to some very dark places over the decades, but that had been the worst. He had never intended to cause Elena the kind of pain that Katherine had caused him, it had honestly never occurred to him that he **_could_**.

Shaking his head Damon took a step back, releasing Elena from his menacing grasp as he suddenly understood the fundamental flaw in her accusation - - he _couldn't_ be her Katherine. Katherine had possessed the power to break him because he had loved her so deeply, Stefan was the one who held that power over Elena because he was the one who held her heart, and _that_ was the cruelest cut of all.

In retrospect, maybe Damon had taken advantage of that fact, used it as an excuse to be brutal because he knew it would injure her less coming from him than it would coming from Stefan, her white knight.

Damon loved his brother, even when they'd hated each other, he'd loved him still. But he hadn't turned Abby tonight in order to protect Stefan, he'd done it to protect Elena from the pain of losing his brother to an ever-spiraling pit of guilt and recrimination.

If Elena wanted him to stop hurting her, to stop killing people to protect her from Klaus, he could do that. Damon could leave town, he could turn off his emotions again and walk away from Mystic Falls and Elena forever, if that's what she wanted. She was right, he _had_ been selfish - hanging around town, pretending he could be the better man for her, pretending that he could ever deserve her love - - it was hurting them both. Nothing had ever wounded him quite as much as daring to hope he had a chance with her the past few months had. That false hope was far worse than knowing it would always be Stefan had ever been.

Elena could almost swear that she actually felt Damon start to slip away from her. She was watching him intently, trying to read his constantly shifting mood, trying to decipher what was going on in his head, he seemed to have made a decision of some kind. Finally, she simply asked him "_What are you thinking right now_?"

Damon looked up at her words, finding her disheveled and bruised after he'd man-handled her yet again, leaning up against the tree where he'd left her, her strength hanging by a thread. If Elena wanted him to stop, he would stop - he would stop coddling her, he would stop loving her, he would make it a clean break.

"_I was just remembering the sound Abby's neck made when it snapped_." he chirped, smirking as her body took an involuntary shudder "_You have no idea how satisfying that crackling sound can be_" he explained cruelly, reveling in the freedom that being an irredeemable bastard again allowed him.

Elena tried to steel herself, she'd known he would fight back, but she had blanched visibly at his words, she couldn't help herself even though she knew he was merely trying to hurt her now. It only took her a second to regain her composure however, she was becoming an expert at diverting Damon's cruel defense mechanisms.

"_Liar_" she accused, calling his bluff, she knew from his response that she had finally gotten through to him, Damon was trying to let her go right now, it's what he thought she wanted him to do "_You were thinking that I'm right about this_." she said certainly

Elena kept pushing forward, narrowing the space between them quickly as she stood right in front of him, looking up at him, meeting his eyes and daring him to lie to her again.

"_You don't know what you're talking about_" Damon answered, his voice low and dangerous as he met her gaze reluctantly "_Katherine broke me because I loved her too much_" he insisted, pain and resignation in his voice "_As long as you're in love with Stefan, I'll never be able to hurt you that way_"

Elena simply stared back at him, holding his gaze steadily but saying nothing. She should have told him sooner than this, she shouldn't have fought him for so long. She'd thought she was protecting them both and now she realized it had been a mistake. Her eyes filled with unshed tears once again as he looked down upon her, the unspoken words clear in her eyes for the first time as he took the time to actually hear her.

"_And if I'm not in love with Stefan anymore_?" Elena finally whispered

Damon swallowed hard, his anger dissipating in favor of an altogether new and far more dangerous emotion - hope. He looked away for a moment, down at the ground, up into the sky, and finally when he could no longer stand it, back at her face. Elena just returned his gaze patiently, waiting for him to understand her meaning.

Damon's eyes returned to their usual blue depths as his face softened, but he clenched his jaw cautiously, trying to read the trick in the moment. She couldn't possibly be saying what he thought she was, not after everything he'd done to hurt her. He needed to hear her say it, he needed to be sure.

"_Say it_" he finally pleaded, his voice barely a breath as he looked down at Elena

"_I'm in love with __**you**__, Damon Salvatore_" came her reply.

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><p><em><span>Author's Note<span>_: _Okay, now we're finally making some forward progress._

_Thanks so much to those who have stuck with me and left reviews, I know I can get a little talk-y :-) I'm big with the character introspection and small with the actual plot sometimes. _

_Next Chapter: rainbows and puppies. Shirtless Damon coming soon!_


	5. Chapter 5

_Author's Note_**: **_I'm making a concerted effort to stay in character as far as the established show-cannon. Hopefully it's not too dark and depressing, I was striving for realistic. This will be the second to last installment, I'm wrapping things up. Thanks so much to all who read and reviewed :-)_

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><p>"<em>I'm in love with <em>_**you**__, Damon Salvatore_" came her reply.

Damon didn't move, afraid that he would wake himself from another dream, although this one was decidedly better than the last. He simply stood there for a minute in surprised silence, allowing her admission to sink in. This was the thing that he had most wanted, practically since the moment he'd met Elena. Now that it was actually happening, he couldn't help but be skeptical. Stefan was the Salvatore brother who won at love, not Damon.

"_I'm in love with you_" Elena repeated in response to his silence, looking into his eyes certainly

Still Damon said nothing, made no motion to move - not toward her, not away from her, he was frozen in place. It couldn't be real, after all the terrible things he had done to her and for her, Elena _couldn't_ be in love with him. Truthfully, a part of him had always known it wasn't possible even if there were moments when he'd foolishly allowed himself to dream that it was. Elena was confused right now, she'd had a traumatic night and she was emotionally overwrought. She thought she'd lost Stefan, Bonnie was angry at her, and she was trying to hold onto something familiar, which right now was him.

Elena could see the hesitation in Damon's eyes as he processed her declaration. Katherine had burned him so badly that his unrequited love had always been safer than the possibility that she could truly return his feelings one day. Elena wasn't sure what to say to reassure him that she wasn't making a reckless or impulsive decision, so she said nothing at all. Instead, she closed the space between them swiftly, leaning forward and pressing her lips to his softly. It was a chaste kiss, meant to be reassuring, comforting, she brushed her lips across his gently, again and again, until he finally responded.

Damon couldn't help it, without his consent his fingers moved to slip themselves through the silky tresses of her hair, pulling Elena closer, opening his mouth so their lips could dance across one another. Their kiss was soft and sweet, like it had been on the porch, and once again Damon found himself pulling away before things could get too heated.

He forced himself to take a step backward, putting some physical distance between them so he could control himself, so he could think rationally where his impulsive nature would normally have taken over.

"_Elena, Stefan's off human blood again_" Damon revealed, holding his hand outstretched to keep her at arm's length away "_He's back on the wagon, he hasn't had a drop since_ . . . " he trailed off, nodding in the direction of the bridge, letting her fill in the blanks for herself.

It would have seemed like such a strange response to her declaration to someone who didn't know Damon the way she did, but Elena understood immediately - - no one had ever chosen him over Stefan. Not their parents, not Katherine, no one had ever put Damon first, he was always the consolation prize. In spite of his protestations to the contrary, he'd never actually thought he stood a chance with her. Right now, he was giving her a way out, the opportunity to take it back if she wanted to.

"_I know that already_" Elena answered simply, stepping forward and taking his outstretched hand in hers, blocking his defensive manuever "_I'm happy for him_" she said as she recalled the conversation she'd already had with Stefan earlier tonight.

"_He loves you and he wants you back_" Damon insisted, trying to take another step away from her, but Elena held tight to his hand "_The two of you could live happily ever after_"

"_Stefan isn't what I want anymore_" Elena responded, lacing her fingers with his in a gesture of intimacy, trying to reassure him that she was certain of her heart.

Damon shifted from foot to foot uncertainly "_I'm an asshole Elena_" he confessed, although it would hardly come as news to her "_Stefan sacrificed himself to save my life and I moved in on his girl while he was gone_."

"_That __**isn't**__ what happened_" Elena argued softly, looking up at him "_Well, it __**is**__ kinda what happened_" she allowed, smiling as she continued "_But_ _I fell in love with you before Stefan left, I just didn't figure it out until after he came back_."

Damon didn't know what to say, Elena seemed so certain and he was quickly running out of reasons to argue with her. He looked down at their hands, fingers intertwined perfectly as if they were always meant to fit together this way.

"_Say it again_" he entreated, half-wishing he hadn't sounded so needy and the other half not caring one bit because he had waited so long for those words from her.

"_I love you_" Elena responded without hesitation

Damon smiled, really smiled for the first time all night, maybe in his entire existence. And then he pulled her close, wrapping his arms around her waist and lifting her off her feet momentarily as he twirled her in a circle. Elena peppered his face with light kisses as he set her back on her feet. Damon let himself bask in the joy of her confession for several moments, enjoying the feel of being able to touch her freely as their fingers played with each other's casually.

Finally, after several minutes of quiet contemplation he finally spoke "_What does this mean_?" he asked her hesitantly. She'd said she loved him, but she hadn't said she wanted to be with him. In fact, everything else she'd said tonight made it sound like she _didn't_ want to be with him.

"_It means that you have a choice to make_" Elena answered easily, she had been waiting for him to ask.

Elena took a deep breath, reluctantly separating herself from him and walking over to where his car was parked, leaning against the hood as she raised her eyes to meet his "_Do you want me_?"

"_You know that I do_" he responded flippantly, his trademark smirk in place.

Damon had wanted Elena since the moment he'd met her and everything he'd learned about her after that had simply intensified the feeling. She was sweet and generous and really really strong. Elena was a fighter, but she wasn't hard on the inside like he was, he didn't know how she managed that but he loved it about her. And she knew _him_ so well too, better than he'd ever let anyone know him before, all the bad as well as the good - - she knew he could be vicious, but somehow she'd accepted him anyway, she'd always been his friend in spite of his many flaws.

"_Not the __**idea**__ of me Damon, the __actual__ me_" Elena explained, bringing the conversation back to it's painful roots "_The me that can't live surrounded by death and collateral damage, the me that hurts when my friends hurt. The me that wants so badly to just be a normal girl._"

Damon didn't say anything, he just listened to what Elena was saying. A sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach told him that she was about to ask for something he couldn't give her.

"_I'm going to die Damon, you know that, right_?" she asked quietly, her eyes watching his as she spoke.

Damon came to stand in front of Elena where she was leaning against his car. He wanted to reach out and touch her, stop her from putting that idea out into the universe, but he resisted the urge. Instinctively, he knew that she needed to do this her way.

"_It might be next month because of Klaus or some other doppleganger-related hijinks_" she continued, finally reaching out and grabbing hold of his jacket gently "_or it might be sixty years from now when I'm old and gray_"

Damon let her tug on his jacket, drawing him closer as she spoke.

"_I'm going to die_" she repeated, running her hand up his chest and behind his neck so she could hold his head steady as she looked into his eyes "_I'm going to leave you and you have to be able to let me, or this will never work_."

Damon swallowed hard at her words - - she would never ask him to turn her. He'd crossed the line when he'd fed her his blood before Klaus' sacrifice, he knew he was wrong. Somehow Elena had gotten past it, she'd forgiven him that worst of all transgressions. She was telling him now that it wouldn't happen a second time.

"_You can never truly have me, unless you are willing to risk losing me_" she whispered

"_Elena, I was wrong_" Damon promised, tucking her hair behind her ear as his hand moved to cup her cheek "_I swear I will never take that choice away from you again_"

Elena felt a tear slip down her cheek, the pad of Damon's thumb brushing it away quickly as it fell. She knew by the look in his eyes that he was sincere in his promise, he understood what she was asking of him.

"_And the collateral damage_?" She asked, holding her breath without even realizing she was doing it "_Can you find another way . . . for me?_" She pleaded, everything riding on his answer.

"_For you _. . . " Damon answered honestly "_I could do anything_"

"_Yeah_?" She questioned, breaking into a huge smile, feeling as if the weight of the world had finally been lifted off her shoulders

"_Yeah_" Damon affirmed, leaning down to kiss her forehead gently "_We'll figure it out_" he assured her

Elena leaned into his body, wrapping her arms around his waist and resting her head on his chest. Damon pulled her close, enveloping her in the safety of his arms and for the first time in a long time, Elena felt like everything might actually work out. She sighed contentedly, never wanting to move from this spot. Damon stroked her hair softly as she relaxed in his arms, feeling her let go of all the tension she'd been carrying around.

Finally, he broke the silence "_It's been a long day_" he noted, kissing the top of her head softly "_Why don't you let me take you home_?"

He felt Elena nod her agreement against his chest.

tbc

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><p><em><span>Author's Note<span>: Final chapter coming shortly - - sexytimes at Casa Gilbert_ :-)


	6. Chapter 6

_Author's Note: Okay, so it was taking me positively **forever** to finish the fnal chapter, so I decided to break it into two parts. The smut will be in the next chapter, I'm having a little trouble with the tone - - I want it to be befitting of three seasons worth of build-up :-) _

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><p>As Damon drove, Elena allowed her head to fall back against the seat. She really was exhausted, not just from the night's near-death events but also from the last few months, maybe the entire past year. She was so tired of being constantly on-edge, constantly worried about what the next day would bring.<p>

Right now in this moment with Damon, she suddenly had the strangest feeling. It wasn't even a feeling at all really, it was more the feeling that was missing, the one she hadn't even realized had become part of her daily life - - fear. She didn't feel it at all right now. Klaus was still a threat, Stefan was still barely back on the wagon, but looking over at Damon in the driver's seat beside her, Elena didn't feel anything right now but safe . . . and sleepy.

Damon smiled as he glanced over at Elena from the corner of his eye - - she had fallen asleep. Her body was turned toward him, her head resting on the seat, hair falling across her face, her breath making several strands dance across the air before settling back into place each time she exhaled. It was hard to believe the day had ended like this given how it had begun, but here he was driving Elena home and they weren't fighting - - she loved him, she actually loved him back.

He suddenly had the overwhelming urge to tuck her hair behind her ear for her, brush it out of her face like he'd wanted to do a hundred times before . . . he didn't have to fight his feelings anymore, so this time he did. Taking one hand off the wheel, he ghosted his fingertips across her forehead gathering the errant strands and sliding his fingers down the side of her skull to tuck them safely behind her ear. Damon smiled again, letting his fingers linger on her cheek momentarily before returning them to the steering wheel.

In her sleep, Elena sighed contentedly at his touch, shifting in the seat and bringing her knees up to tuck them against her chest. It didn't look the slightest bit comfortable to Damon, but it _was_ the most beautiful thing he'd seen in positively ages. Truthfully, he'd watched her sleep before - - before he'd fallen in love with her and then, many times after. Elena's dreams had always seemed dark to him from the outside, the furrow in her brow always present as she slept. He couldn't help but notice that furrow was strangely absent now.

Fifteen minutes later he pulled into her driveway, leaving the motor running for a moment as he watched her sleep, trying to decide if he should bother waking her or simply carry her up to her bed. It had been a difficult day for Elena, so in the end Damon opted for letting her sleep. Turning off the engine, he walked around to the passenger side opening the door as quietly as he could. Leaning down Damon gathered her in his arms, but before he could lift her from the seat, Elena spoke.

"_I'm awake_" she mumbled sleepily, rolling her head across the seat to stare up at him.

Elena awoke from a blessedly dreamless sleep to find herself wrapped in Damon's arms. He was leaning over her, his arms positioned to hoist her from the car seat and Elena thought about letting him for a minute, letting Damon take care of her. And then her thoughts took a decidedly dirtier turn as she inhaled his scent and basked in the nearness of him - he was only a hair's breadth away and he smelled so good, and she gave serious consideration to jumping his bones right there in her driveway. But there would be time for that later she decided, right now she just wanted him to take her to bed and hold her while she slept, to make her feel safe and secure.

Unable to resist, she brushed her lips against his as they lingered so close to hers. "_I can walk_" she whispered.

Damon reluctantly released her from his grasp, standing up and offering his hand instead as he held the car door open for her. Elena took his out-stretched hand, letting him lead her up the walkway and onto the front porch, their fingers intertwined. Damon paused at the front door as she fished her house-key out of her pocket and slipped it easily into the lock, turning it quickly. Jeremy was in Colorado and Alaric was staying at Meredith's tonight, so they would be all alone in the house.

Elena turned the knob and opened the door, surprised when Damon didn't immediately follow her inside. Damon had invited himself into her house on numerous previous occasions and now suddenly he was standing on ceremony? It was a very sweet impulse and she would swear that she could actually feel herself falling a little deeper in love with him at this moment.

"_Would you stay with me tonight_?" Elena whispered, lacing her fingers through his and pulling him along behind her

Damon nodded wordlessly, following her into the foyer.

Elena tossed her keys on table beside the door and turned the deadbolt behind them, locking the rest of the world out. It had been one helluva a looong day and she could barely stifle a yawn as she continued "_Would you just hold me_?"

"_Of course_" he answered, following her up the stairs and down the hallway to her bedroom. He would do anything she asked him to.

As they entered the darkened room Elena tried to mentally calculate how messy her room was right now or whether she had left anything embarrassing laying around. It had been an impulse to invite Damon to stay, she hadn't planned on doing it, but it felt so right in the moment. She had wanted to feel his arms around her as she slept, wanted to feel safe in the way only he could make her feel. Elena walked across the room turning on the bedside light and was relieved to see her room wasn't that bad - - a few dirty socks and her open journal on the desk, hardly anything to worry about, she was an open book now as far as Damon was concerned anyway.

"_I'm going to take a quick shower_" Elena explained, walking toward the bathroom. "_Just make yourself at home, okay_?"

Damon nodded in affirmation, walking over to peer out the window. It could have felt awkward, being alone in her bedroom like this, knowing Elena was naked only a few yards away, but it didn't feel the slightest bit weird at all to him, it felt perfectly right.

Elena let the warm water cascade over her, soothing her tired muscles, washing away the dirt and grime of Rebekah's imprisonment. It had become a daily habit for Elena - - washing the blood and the fear and all of the day's horror's off of herself each night. Ever since Stefan had left with Klaus, Elena had found herself in a puddle on the shower floor crying herself raw practically every night. Tonight it was different, tonight she didn't feel scared or uncertain. She knew she had plenty of reasons to be, but something inside her had shifted now. Now, she felt hopeful. She even found herself humming softly as she shampooed her hair.

Damon chuckled softly to himself as he listened to the faint sound of Elena's humming over the rush of water. She sounded like he _felt_ right now - - happy, genuinely happy for the first time in maybe forever. It was an unfamiliar feeling and part of him was scared, he didn't have the best track-record with love. But somehow he knew this time would be different; Elena was different, _he_ was different.

Damon took off his jacket and laid it across the back of her desk chair. Elena's bedroom felt different tonight, he'd been here a dozen times before, but this time she'd invited him, she wanted him here and it made the room feel warmer, more inviting than it ever had before.

He'd watched her sleep before - keeping watch, keeping her safe. In the past, he'd always had to disappear if she began to stir, tonight she had invited him to stay, to hold her while she slept and it was something he realized he _really_ wanted to do. He wasn't just in love with Elena, he was positively besotted with her - - he would lay next to her for a lifetime and never do anything but sleep if that's what she wanted.

Several minutes later, Elena returned to her bedroom dressed in her plaid pajama bottoms and a tank top, her damp hair hanging in wavy curls down her back. She found Damon standing beside the window, staring out into the night. He'd taken his jacket off and laid it across her desk chair, his shoes and socks were stacked neatly beside her door. He turned around and smiled in her direction when he heard her come in.

Elena returned his smile, walking over to her dresser and picking up her brush, running it through her hair several times. Elena could see Damon in the mirror, watching her as she worked the tangles out of her hair, his eyes locked on her every movement. He was staring at her hotly, unabashedly appreciating every move she made and suddenly Elena understood just how much she desired him as she felt the butterflies begin to dance in the pit of her stomach. Backlit by the moonlight, standing barefoot in her room with his trademark top shirt buttons undone, Damon Salvatore was quite possibly the sexiest thing she had ever seen. And right this minute, Elena realized that she was no longer the slightest bit sleepy . . . .

tbc


	7. Chapter 7

_Authors' Note: Sorry this installment took such a long time, I was really trying to do justice to three seasons worth of build-up. I hope you guys like it. Thanks to those who have left reviews, it keeps me motivated to keep writing :-)_

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><p><em>Backlit by the moonlight, standing barefoot in her room with his trademark top shirt buttons undone, Damon was quite possibly the sexiest thing Elena had ever seen and right this minute, she realized that she was no longer the slightest bit sleepy <em>. **. . .**

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><p>Elena returned his gaze, their eyes locked in the reflection of the mirror. Placing the hairbrush down on the dresser, Elena turned and walked over to kiss him softly on the mouth, her lips dancing lightly across his. Damon returned her kiss, inhaling deeply - she smelled like strawberries. Elena stepped closer then, invading his personal space to wrap her arms around his neck and press the entire length of her body into his as she deepened their kiss. Damon was a little surprised when her tongue swept across his lips, but he opened his mouth, granting her access. Elena's tongue explored his mouth, tasting the faint tinge of bourbon that still remained from his earlier bender.<p>

Damon let his hands travel down her sides, coming to rest on the small of her back, holding her in place as she plundered his mouth. Elena's fingers curled sexily through the hair at the nape of his neck, she tugged slightly, causing currents of sensation to shoot from every nerve-ending in his scalp. If his heart could beat at all, it would have been pounding right now. Finally, he broke the kiss reluctantly, pulling away only far enough so that he could speak.

"_I thought you were exhausted_?" he murmured, his hands rubbing her back lightly as he spoke. Now that he could touch her any time he liked, he intended to take full advantage of that fact and as often as possible.

"_I changed my mind_" Elena whispered breathlessly, giving him a brief peck on the lips "_I'm not tired anymore_" she smiled, shuffling backward and tugging him in the direction of the bed, her eyebrows arching suggestively.

Damon allowed her to lead him across the room, their bare feet dancing together across the carpet. Elena stopped when the back of her legs hit the bed, standing up on her tiptoes again to pull him down for another searing kiss.

Elena's lips meshed with his deliciously, as if they had always been meant to dance this dance together. She let one hand drop from his neck to wander across the collar of his shirt and then downwards, her fingers following the fabric until they reached the exposed flesh of his chest. Elena let her fingertips graze across Damon's skin, surprised to find how warm he felt to her touch.

Damon felt like every nerve in his body was on fire, burning from her caress. Elena's fingers were blazing heat across his skin while her lips tangled with his, her tongue sweeping boldly into his mouth to duel with his own. Damon let his hand wander further down her back, finding the hem of her tank top and allowing his fingers to slip underneath, pressing his palm into the flesh of her back, holding her close to him.

Elena's heart was pounding in her chest as she kissed him. She had wanted to be this close to Damon for so long, and now she never wanted to stop. Without her conscious knowledge she found her fingers dancing lower, catching in the buttons of his shirt and releasing them slowly until his shirt hung open beneath her hand.

As their tongues continued to battle for dominance, Elena allowed her other hand to leave the hair at the nape of Damon's neck, traveling south until both her hands splayed across his bare chest, slipping the shirt from his shoulders easily and sending it floating to the ground.

Damon was lost in the sensation of kissing her, Elena made him feel like he was flying and falling all at the same time, and somewhere in the dim recesses of his mind he was vaguely aware that he was losing his clothing.

Elena moved her hands across Damon's chest, then downward across the planes of his torso, relishing the feel of his powerful muscles fluttering helplessly under her touch, committing to memory the way his body reacted to her, her lips never leaving his as her fingers explored.

As Elena's hands dipped lower, the fog of desire surrounding his brain lifted a little and Damon realized that she was heading in the direction of his belt. A brief flash of uncertainty crept into his mind as he understood just how real this was getting. He'd been with a lot of women in his lifetime, more than his fair share, and he'd never had any complaints. But suddenly, it occurred to Damon that it had been 145 years since he'd actually _made love_ to a woman. He'd been human the last time he'd done so in fact, and he wasn't certain he was capable of making that emotional and physical connection anymore. In his mind, Elena had always been unattainable so he'd never given serious thought to the question before. Now she was here with him, keening in his arms and he was feeling the unfamiliar pangs of self-doubt.

Elena could feel Damon stiffen beneath her as her hands ghosted across his waist, her fingers playing with his buckle, trying to release it from it's confines. Elena smiled against his mouth where their lips were still fused together, as she purposefully moved her hands away from his belt and headed north again toward safer ground. She let her hands rest on his chest quietly, stilling her movement momentarily as she broke their passionate kiss.

Damon felt the loss acutely as Elena pulled her lips from his, he may have even moaned involuntarily in protest as she stepped back to look up at him with her big brown eyes. As she met his gaze she smiled warmly at him, and Damon would have sworn that Elena knew exactly what he was thinking right now. Then she stepped forward again, wrapping her arms around his shoulders and pulling him into a bear hug, her head resting against his neck. There was such intimacy in this simple gesture that Damon's heart actually ached as he wrapped his arms around her, returning her embrace. This was the way she'd previously undone him, it was how she'd crept into his cold dead heart in the first place. How had she always known how to reach him when no one else could?

Elena could feel Damon relax under her, she could feel him begin to let go of his uncertainty. Without breaking their embrace she turned her head slightly placing a feather-soft kiss on his cheek, then another on his lips, then another on his other cheek - - soft chaste kisses meant to reassure him. As she felt the tension in his body dissipate beneath her, Elena kissed him again on the cheek.

"_Hey, don't be nervous okay?_" she whispered, her lips lingering beneath his ear sending delicious chills down his spine "_I'm not the one who bites_" she teased, pulling his earlobe into her mouth briefly before releasing it.

Damon felt her words shoot straight to his heart; Elena was joking with him, trying to get him out of his own head long enough to realize that they'd already taken the scariest leap of all tonight, this wasn't the scary part, this was the _**fun**_ part. God, he loved her.

Elena watched the emotions play across his face as he listened to what she was saying and heard what she wasn't. Smiling wickedly as the idea occurred to her, Elena moved her fingers downward again and reaching beneath Damon's ribs, she scratched lightly at the base of his spine, letting her nails flutter across the sensitive skin located there.

Damon leapt back in surprise - - she was tickling him! Elena just stood there smirking at him for a second as he recovered. "_What was __**that**_?" he asked, returning her smile. She had most definitely succeeded in breaking the tension that he was feeling.

"_Beneath the ribcage, near the base of the spine_ . . ." she answered, trailing off as she walked forward to grasp his hand in hers ". . . _you said that was my way to a vampire's heart_"

Damon smiled, remembering the day that he'd said those very words to her, when he'd promised never to let anyone hurt her. It made him feel warm inside to know she cherished those memories the same way he did, that they had meant as much to her.

"_You already have my heart_" Damon promised, nodding in understanding finally - - love and sex had been different things for him for over a century, now they were the same again. He was afraid because he loved her, but _because_ he loved her there wasn't anything to fear.

"_I know who you are Damon_" Elena murmured, leaning forward to kiss him swiftly on the lips "_I __**love**__ who you are_" she promised, her eyes meeting his steadily.

Damon nodded, feeling any remaining doubt slip away under the sincerity of her gaze.

"_It's right, right now_" Elena whispered, her fingertips reaching up to stroke his cheek as she spoke.

And then, they were finished talking.

Damon's eyes met hers, burning straight into her soul as they always had. Passion consumed him, he had wanted her to say those words for months now. Within a moment he was in front of her, his hands reaching for her face, his lips pressing against hers.

Time seemed to stand still and speed up all at the same time. Elena had been unprepared for his power, Damon had never kissed her like _this_ before. She suddenly realized that he had always held back in the past, knowing she was unsure. This time, Damon was letting her see all of him.

The fire in his touch was exquisite as his lips meshed with hers. His hands threaded through her hair pulling her close, stilling her movement. She wanted everything from him. Elena opened her mouth and Damon pulled her closer, wrapping his arms around her waist as his tongue swept across hers. The sensations bombarding Elena's mind were too numerous to process, even if she could have found the thought to do so. Damon tasted like blood, and bourbon, and heaven.

Every nerve in her body felt electrified, she thought her legs would give out as Damon continued his thorough exploration of her mouth, his hands steadying her, but remaining remarkably still themselves. Elena moaned into his mouth, wrapping her arms around his neck as she tried to get closer. Truly kissing Damon was a rush of contradictions, just as Damon himself had always been - - reckless yet protective, brave but somehow fragile, sometimes cruel and other times heart-breakingly sweet.

Elena leaned her body into his leaving only a hair's breadth between them, she could feel the evidence of his desire hard against her stomach. The heat between them was spreading like wildfire, quick and all-consuming.

Damon slid his hands from her face and down past her waist to cup her behind, pulling her tighter to him. Elena arched her back, molding her hips into his, wrapping both arms tighter around his neck, seeking to eliminate all space between them. Damon lifted her easily, spinning around to shuffle backward toward her bed. When he reached the bed, he fell backward, pulling Elena down on top of him. Damon sat up quickly, threading his fingers through her hair, kissing her senseless.

Elena matched him stroke for stroke, her fingers playing with the short hairs on his neck as her tongue swept along his mouth, his lips, biting playfully each time he drew back to allow her air. Elena ran her lips across his jaw-line and down his neck, breathing fire within her touch. She pulled at his skin with her teeth as she made her way down his neck toward his collarbone, using her tongue to soothe the red patches she'd made.

Elena raked her nails down his chest and across his abdomen. She could feel Damon's muscles twitch at her ministrations, he seemed to tremor with every touch and it made her feel powerful. Feeling bold, Elena splayed her hand across his chest, pushing Damon back to lie down across the bed. Teasingly slowly, she began at his waist, her lips kissing every inch of exposed skin as she worked her way toward his head.

Damon was trembling with desire, he'd never felt anything this intense. His eyes watched her as she moved without hurry, scorching him with every kiss. She was the most beautiful creature he had ever seen, her brown locks splayed wildly, covering her face as she pressed her lips to his belly, then his chest, moving so deliberately, so torturously. His hands rubbed at her back impatiently, trying to pull her up, towards his lips.

"_You're shaking_" she murmured against his chest, ignoring the urgency in his hands.

When Elena finally reached his neck, pausing to nibble at the sensitive spot where it met his collarbone, Damon found he couldn't take anymore. Yanking her face roughly toward him with one hand, he used the other to push himself into a seated position once more. Elena gasped as his mouth descended on hers once again, Damon's lips crashed against hers, passionately devouring her, his last vestige of control totally gone as she purred his name.

Elena was lost in a cascade of sensation. The intensity of his kiss was immeasurable, as if everything that had been left unsaid between them was now being communicated without words. Damon wanted to be with her, she could feel him hard against her center, pulsing with desire. She shifted her hips into his, causing him to groan loudly.

"_You are so beautiful_" he said huskily, cupping her face.

Elena shuttered in his arms, the way Damon was looking at her made her stomach flutter. His eyes held love, and desire and the promise of things to come. She leaned in to kiss him, sparks flying as her lips met his. Damon pressed his hand to her back, pulling her tightly to him as his tongue swept into her mouth.

Elena allowed herself to melt into him, sinking further down into his lap. She could feel his hardness, throbbing beneath her center, creating the most delicious burn low in her belly as his tongue set her mouth ablaze. Elena moaned as Damon's mouth left hers now, to kiss and suckle her breasts through her silk tanktop, as his hands ground her hips down into his own.

Elena ran her hands through his hair. Gasping as the pad of his thumb flicked back and forth over one nipple, she let her head fall back bonelessly. Just when she thought she might come apart, he switched to the other nipple, nibbling his way back up her neck, kissing her soundly on the lips as his hands continued to knead her breasts. It felt as if molten lava were flowing through her veins, every nerve from her fingertips to the tips of her toes was alive and singing.

Suddenly, Elena found herself flying through the air as Damon used his vampire speed to flip them over, depositing her gently on the bed beneath him. When she looked up, she found his beautiful blue eyes burning into hers. Damon trailed his hands from her hair, down her arms to lace his fingers through her own, pulling them over her head. Using one hand to keep her arms in place, he trailed the other slowly down across her belly and under the fabric of her shirt, his fingers massaging the soft skin located there for a moment before ridding her of the garment with super-speed.

Elena felt only the barest whisper of wind as Damon removed her shirt in an instant, sending it flying across the room. He let go of her wrists then and Elena took advantage of the freedom to pull him up for another mind-numbing kiss.

"_That was a neat trick_" she murmured appreciatively against his lips, her back arching up to press her bare torso into his, loving the feel of his skin as it glided across hers.

"_I've got moves you've never seen_" he responded, a twinkle in his eye.

Damon pulled his lips from hers, kissing and biting softly with his human teeth as he made his way down her neck, the rush of blood pounding through her veins sounded like heaven to him as he continued across her collarbone and down the valley between her breasts, moving across her stomach slowly and deliberately, tasting every inch of exposed skin. When he reached her waist, Damon hooked his fingers into the waistband of her pajama bottoms tugging them gently and slowly down the length of her legs before dropping them to the floor at the foot of the bed.

When he looked up, he discovered Elena watching him intently, her eyes dark with desire. Damon's fingers moved slowly up her calf, his lips following them, placing open-mouth kisses across every delicious inch of skin.

Her ankle, her calf, her knee, Damon was discovering erogenous zones Elena had no idea she even _had_ as he moved torturously, climbing slowly toward her center. When his lips began their maddening ascent across her thigh, Elena feared she might pass out. When his lips kissed her hipbone softly before taking her panties between his teeth, she nearly _did_.

Damon paused at her mid-section briefly, his eyes looking up to find hers as he took the fabric of her undergarment between his teeth. Elena had propped herself up on her elbows and was watching his every move. When his eyes met hers, she arched her eyebrows in challenge, daring him to finish what he'd started. Never one to back down, Damon tugged gently, pulling the lacy fabric down the length of her legs with his mouth.

Elena shivered as the combination of Damon's hot breath and the scrape of the cool fabric both moving dangerously slowly across her skin threatened to undo her. Elena could feel her own heartbeat, leaping erratically in her chest as everything he did seemed to send her higher, the air positively crackling with the electricity that surrounded them.

Damon dropped the garment to the floor atop the growing pile of discarded clothing, his eyes never leaving Elena's. As he rose, Elena crooked her finger in his direction, motioning for him to come closer. At Elena's invitation, Damon was finished teasing.

He leaped toward the head of the bed, crashing into her waiting arms, his lips seeking hers again. His weight pressed her solidly into the mattress as he kissed her mouth, his tongue charting every inch, memorizing her taste, her feel, the sounds she made. He would never be done with her, but then he'd known that already.

Elena moved her hands between them to work on Damon's belt, slipping her hand inside his jeans, massaging him through his boxers.

"_God_" he gasped into her mouth as her fingers brushed over him purposefully. Making love to Elena was like flying too close to the sun, the heat was irresistible, he ached to be consumed by it.

"_Take off your pants_" Elena commanded, pulling his earlobe into her mouth and sucking gently as her hands fumbled with his trousers.

There were times when the increased speed was a real advantage, and this was one of them. Damon was able to discard his remaining clothing at the end of the bed before Elena even knew what was happening, settling back into her arms skin on skin.

"_**That**__ is coming in really handy_" Elena remarked, her eyes dancing with laughter as she ran her arms up and down his bare backside.

Damon looked down at Elena, no physical or emotional barriers left between them as they lay naked together "_Do you have any idea what you do to me_?" he whispered, his fingers brushing across her face reverently.

"_I think it's time you show me_" she invited, pulling him closer, Elena's fingers digging into his behind.

Damon sank inside her slowly, the exquisite heat causing him to see stars as they finally connected on every conceivable level. As he moved inside of her, Damon could feel all the shattered pieces of who he _had_ been and who he _was going_ to be falling into place around them. Elena was bringing him back to life again. They moved together perfectly, their bodies as one. And as the fire swirled around them and through them, devouring everything that they had been separately, Damon finally understood . . .

.

.

.

Together, nothing would ever break them.

* * *

><p><strong>The End<strong>


End file.
